Grief

So I finished A Grief Observed yesterday. It is basically a book of C.S. Lewis grieving and mourning the loss of his wife... I hurt for him. I can't imagine what that feels like to lose someone who is so close.. so close that they make up a part of you.


I can't really relate to the intensity of Lewis' sadness.. but everyone knows how it feels to hurt to some extent. And like Lewis.. lately I hurt because I know people that are going away.. both physically and spiritually. The physical "going away" is my friends who are leaving for college.. some very dear to me. It's just kind of weird them not being in close proximity. But that's something I can cope with much easier than watching friends who are spiritually "going away". For there are people that I know who are walking away from God... people whom I love. And the part that makes me saddest is that it seems they aren't just stumbling in their walk like we all do.. it's as if they are blatantly turning their back on God. And I pray that's not true.. I pray they're not saying "screw you" to God.. I hurt for them tremendously.

And then there are the people that aren't "going away".. they are the friends that don't have the option of doing so. They are my friends who are lost. They are the people I hurt for the most. I feel so disconnected from them... maybe I feel a tiny dose of the separation Lewis felt from his wife whom he loved so dearly when she passed... just in a different sense. So, I pray they accept God's love.. I pray they come to know my Jesus.. because they may not think so.. but they need Him.. they need him more than anything else.